The Courage to Start Again

Most people who know me know that I have struggled with my weight all my life. 

There have been times that I have been successful in losing weight, only to fail and put it all back on again.

In 2012, I did the 60 day juice fast and went from 294 pounds down to 217 pounds.  I thought I had found the answer to my problems.  I ended up putting it all back on and more, eventually weighing my highest at 340 pounds.

So why try again? Why try when multiple times in my life I have lost a significant amount of weight only to put it back on again?  Each time costing me more of my self-esteem as the failures mount one after another.

I think part of it is the realization that I only really fail if I stop trying.  I live with the hope that someday I can find a way through this problem and be happy where I am at.

I have learned recently that sometimes you have to take a long hard look at yourself and be brutally honest about what you find, even though it is painful.

So why start again? Because if I do not, nothing changes.

So I have started the keto diet, also known as ketogenic diet.  Mainly it is a balance of fats and proteins, and very little carbs. I have cut out milk, soda, bread, pasta, cookies, pizza and anything else that contains carbohydrates. I watch my macro intake (protein/fat/carbohydrates) and my calorie intake at My Fitness Pal (an online tracking program).

So far I am down to around 24 pounds in about six weeks, averaging out at about 4 pounds a week. A little higher than I probably ought to, but right now there is some balance there so I am going to work with it.

Because if I do not, nothing changes. Time passes, frustration mounts, regret builds and dreams die.

That is unacceptable to me, so I start again.

Wish me luck.